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3 Steps to Heal

Transmute Yourself Minis Episode 10 - “That is the healing. Three simple points: the truth, forgiveness, and self-love. With these three points, the whole world will heal and will no longer be a mental hospital.” - Miguel Ruiz, The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship --Toltec Wisdom Book

The truth will set you free, said Jesus. That is the first point to real, emotional and even physical healing, according to Don Miguel Ruiz, and that is also my interpretation of Jesus’s quote. The truth, what is it, do we ask ourselves so often? And the truth is really and simply reality, meaning, what is, as opposed to the stories that we tell ourselves in our heads that translate into interpretations and assumptions that deepen our emotional wounds and make us sick. The truth is simply what is real!

Actually, reality tends to be way sweeter than the stories that we tell ourselves about it. In truth, reality doesn’t judge, it simply is, things happen, and we can decide to make the best out of them or to hold on to them and get stuck. When we get away from judging reality as good or bad, be it a trauma from the past or any experience that is holding us back from healing and being ourselves to the fullest, we will realize that whatever happened was necessary to take us where we are now and it has led to wisdom. The rest are stories in our heads that, to make things worse, we tend to exaggerate through victim lenses that are simply not real.

The second healing point is forgiveness. We forgive not to let someone off the hook of our grudge but to let ourselves off the hook. As Malachy McCourt once said: “resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die”. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that we have to have a great relationship or friendship with whoever hurt us, it simply means that we let go of the grudge that is wreaking so much havoc within us. It can be as simple as ignoring the voices in our head telling us why we shouldn’t forgive, and opening our hearts, and saying the words “I forgive you”. Yes, pain might still be there and it might take some time for you to fully let go, but that first little step will open the lid to slowly let go of all that poison that has been damaging you from the inside out. Understand that those that hurt you, did it under the influences of their own mental drugs, their own resentment, but deep inside, in our essence, removing those layers of emotional pain that we all have, we are all kindness and love.

The third point is, to me, the most important one: self-love. If we love ourselves truly, would we let trauma hold us back? Would we let resentment control us emotionally and live a life of suffering and despair? I think that self-love recognizes that, as far as we know, we only have this life that if we decide to do so, we could live it to the fullest! It also recognizes that suffering, although part of the human experience, has no place in a heart that is filled with love for itself, and as a result, for everyone and all of life’s experiences.

So there you have it! I trust that now you have some great ideas to start your own healing journey! If you want to know more about the author of this quote, I really want to recommend to you the book "The Mastery of Love" by Don Miguel Ruiz, and also "The Four Agreements", which has helped me to view life through a new perspective.

Don't forget to reach out if you need support in your own healing and we can explore how I can be of support to you through my coaching services. To do so, just send me an email to Talk to you soon!

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